I must admit I have been depressed lately. I've been worried about my unemployment state, confused about some promises that have yet to be fulfilled, guilty about wasting time with distractions and not completing my book. I don't even want to relive the thoughts and feelings I have experienced this season of my life. It seems harder to pray even more harder to believe. Don't know how to describe it but when you experience the same mental battles and emotional struggles over and over again the coping skills that once sustained you (even prayer) seem to lose their effectiveness. This is the state I seem to live in more often than not. But the Scripture is clear to not cease to pray. So no matter how difficult it was to go before the Lord the God in me mustered up the strength to pray this morning and I tell you I was transformed once again. It took some time to get my mind focused and to feel what I was praying but it didn't take long after I began to reflect on His goodness. I praised Him pass the mood and was reminded in prayer that God will complete the good work He has begun in my life (Phil 1:6 ). I recalled the things God had brought me through since my adolescence to now. I was reminded I'm only alive because My God spared my life ( I have a wonderful testimony and may share later) and yes for His good purpose. My God brought something to my attention that I had never considered quite like I had this morning . The Lord spared me guilt, shame, remorse and condemnation concerning the two most devastating experiences of my life – losing my mother at 17 and my divorce some 5 years ago. It was His Rhema word given to me specifically concerning both situation that blessed me. Yes, God loves me. Yes God loves you and proves His love every time our heart beats whether or not we hear or feel it. My eyes not only released a river of joyful tears but my heart was crying too because it had felt God once again. I would like to share several insights God revealed to me during my devotional this morning. I pray it transforms your mind and emotion like it did me.

 

1. What God has promised to do He will fulfill. What happened or hasn't happened has nothing to do with Him keeping his word.
   
2. Stand on what you know. Forget about what has happened or hasn't happened and stand on what you know whatever that know is……
   
3. God will fulfill or complete the good work He has begun in your life. The good work has nothing to do with you but everything to do in God. The good work is His work planned before creation and if you are sincere, available, obedient and willing God will fulfill it (Phil 1:6).
   
4. Don't cease to pray (Col 1:6). Talking to God may be difficult at times because talking makes you confront painful situations. But talking is confession and confession is good for the soul. You must talk to God about what your thinking and what your feelings because He cares about your thoughts and feelings.
   
5. Pray with thankfulness. Being thankful can be difficult when facing difficult situations but it is medicine to your heart. I had to think back to some things God did for me in my youth to muster up some thankfulness for today. I tell you the more I thanked God the more I felt renewed and assured.
   
6. Be anxious for nothing. I will expound on this in a later post but I was so moved with the insight God gave me about myself concerning this Scripture. This might seem odd but God don't want us to be anxious not even for His promises.
   

The God of Justice

2009 was a very difficult year for me. I was fired (wrongfully terminated) from my job on January 5th 2009, a day before my birthday. I was devastated for there was no cause of action for my termination. The whole situation took me by complete surprise. In addition to being fired, unemployment denied my claim siding with my employer not believing a word I said although I spoke the truth, whole truth and nothing but the truth. This denial added injury to my already wounded heart. I felt like Job in a small way- One catastrophe after another.

Despite this wrong, however, I always believed that God would vindicate me. I didn’t know when or how but I knew it was only a matter of time before He gave a judgment in my favor. Why did I believe this? Because I believed He was and is the God of justice and He would be on the side of those who are right. And I knew I was right in this matter. Nonetheless, that matter of time (the four months it took me to have my appeal) was emotionally, mentally and spiritually exhausting and trying. During that time, I cried many tears of worry, anger and hate about my present state and future and about those who had did me wrong. Did I mention I’m single with 2 kids (one in college who depends financially on me) and not only unemployed but with without unemployment or steady income. During those trying months, I didn’t know how I would make it. I had never been in a financially situation like this before and I was scared. I actually compiled a list of the people I would stay with if I was to become homeless. I cried out to God for my son who was finacially struggling as well. I could no longer afford to pay his rent. Despite the long restless nights, however, I had an innate knowing that God would vindicate me. But I had to go and make it through this test. I had been married for majority of my adult life and I had my husband to take care of me all of those 10 years. Now, single 5 years I knew the time would come when I would have to prove my dependence on God. Would I fall and crumble during the test? Or would I fight for my faith and trust God that He would not only meet all my needs but He would give me the victory I worked for and deserved. Now it’s the long awaited day of my appeal in May 2009. Before I left my home I prayed. My last request from The God of Justice was “Lord, let the judge do something he has never done or rarely does”. I was referring to the judge giving me a judgment after my hearing. I had waited 4 long months and I didn’t want to wait a day longer for a verdict. So I had my say in court and now my attorney, witness proceed to leave the room. Oh did I mention my employer didn’t attend the hearing. Oh and did I mention they were shut down by the county 1 month after I was fired. You see God don’t like ugly. The God of Justice shut them down (amongst other reasons) to prevent them from coming to the appeal with lies and this was no coincidence. Anyway, as we proceeded to leave my free legal aid attorney (contact one in your area if you need them) asked the judge how long it would be before I got a verdict. He went on to say how he couldn’t give specifics, he has a lot of cases but his last words were: I TELL YOU THIS, I’M GOING TO FIX THIS. I broke down in tears when I heard these words. Aren’t these the words of a righteous king vindicating the afflicted, troubled, and wronged? His words rang true indeed. One month later I received about 9 checks from unemployment. Yes, The Department of Employment had to overturn the false counts against me. Yes, they retroactively paid me for all the months I should’ve received unemployment. No, I didn't loose my house! No, I didn't loose my credit rating! No, I didn't loose my mind! No, I didn't loose my faithfulness to God. This testimony is true. I do not lie. Not only did God prove to be the God of Justice and vindicate but He showed me He was with me even till the end by answering my prayer when the judge did something he never did before and gave me a verdict with his words “I’M GOING TO FIX THIS”. Selah, pause and think on this. For any of you who have been wronged whether from an employer, neighbor, friend, family member, spouse or church – remember that God is the God of Justice and HE WILL FIX IT.

Getting through to unemployment is a nightmare. I found this code on the internet which enables me to get through to a live operator with a high success rate. But you must follow these instructions for this code doesn't work with all EDD telephone numbers. The steps are as follows:

1. Call 1800-300-5616. Edd has new telephone numbers but they don't work with this code.

2. Wait for the automated voice that says "Welcome to the Employment Development Department". Their is another automated voice but you must enter the code with the welcome voice. You may have to call several times before you get the welcome message but once again this message is crucial.

3. Enter 1, 3, 0 when you hear the welcome. Your wait time will be about 5 minutes. One of two things will happen depending on how busy they are. You will talk to an operator who will give you specifics about your claim or an operator will take your information and pass it along to correct person who will call you back. Either way, you talk to someone.


If you have won an appeal I have fax numbers where you can fax your awards letter directly to EDD. I called EDD to inquire about my check (after several weeks after receiving my award) and was given a fax number where i could fax my awards letter because they hadn't got my award letter from the appeals board. I learned that the appeals board mail their award notices to EDD about once a month. My checks were mailed out within 5 days after faxing over my award letter. If you want to expedite your claim send me a message and I will give you the fax numbers.